Welcome to Konoha boys school!
by Forest Reader
Summary: Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE’s? with the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, lets hope so
1. Starting Again

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Hi Everyone! My names CoCoBookmark :D

and this is my first ever Fanfic!

Don't hate me if it sucks!

I don't have a beta…

Don't know what one is XD

BUT I would like one very much!

So if you want the job it's yours!

Anyway…

_Thoughts_

"speaking"

**WARNINGS: **Boy X Boy lurve XD (So no homophobes please, homosexual's have enough to deal with without closed minded f**khead's like you lot coming a long and making it harder for them) future lemon! I WILL DO IT!

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing, if I did, Naruto would be rated N17.

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? with the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, lets hope so.

THANKS FOR CLICKING ON THE LINK…If your still there that is XD ON WITH THE FIC!!!

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Welcome to Konoha boys school!

**Chapter one: starting again**

Naruto stood in front of the ominous looking gates that lead to Konoha all boys secondary school, shaking in his brand new grey trousers, his sky blue eyes taking in everything about the grand old building, the wind brushing through his spiky blonde hair, worry evident on the blonde's face.

He had just moved away from everything he knew to move with his two fathers, Kakashi and Iruka, down to the _absolutely massive _town of Konoha. Iruka had landed a job teaching in this new school, and it paid a lot better than his old job, so they packed their things and moved.

He now lived to far away to go to his previous school, so he had been transferred to Konoha boys. The uniform was ok, a white button up top with grey dress trousers and grey blazer, but Naruto was sure he could liven it up with some orange when he got home!

Although that was the last thing on his mind.

_What if no-one likes me?_

_What if they think I'm a freak because of…these?_

His hand reached up to trace the three whisker like birth marks on his cheeks.

_Or because of ruka and kashi?_

No matter where he went, people tended to avoid him, his real parents had died when he was born, and Kakashi and Iruka had adopted him, but having two male carers tended to keep the closed minded people of his old town away, and untrusting parents made sure their kids didn't hang around with the town's reject.

He pushed the thoughts from his mind, no good dwelling on the past when a brand spanking new future was staring you in the face.

With his face showing none of his inner turmoil,

He headed into the school reception to get his timetable.

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There was one word you could use to describe Sasuke Uchiha at this precise moment.

And that was bored! And It was only the beginning of the day and he was already plotting the ways his teacher could disappear without the law getting involved…

His face was blank as he stared out the window.

Everyday was the same, wake up, go to school, suffer, go home, avoid older brother, sleep redo, that was it.

Oh how he _longed_ for a change!

Little did he know that change was coming through the door at that precise moment.

There was a short sweet knock at the door, followed by a blonde head, and a startling pair of sky blue eyes.

Sasuke gasped.

No, Uchiha's did NOT gasp, they took sharp intakes of breath!

So…sasuke took a sharp intake of breath

He examined the beauty before him, taking in every detail, from his wild blonde hair, to the interesting whisker like lines on his cheeks, his thin feminine, yet muscular body and his pale pink, extremely kissable lips.

One word ran through his mind

_Mine!_

He watched his blonde, yes _his _blonde, converse with the form tutor before turning to face the class.

"class, we have a new student today, His name is Naruto Uzumaki, I hope you will all make him welcome, Naruto, would you like to introduce your self to the class a bit better"

"A…ah yes! Erm…hi! My name, as you already know is Naruto Uzumaki, I'm 16 and just moved here from Mizukage and live with my dad's, My favourite colour is orange and I love Foxes".

His gaze landed on Sasuke and he smiled.

"ok Naruto, why don't you go and sit next to…Ah…Sasuke and we'll get started!"

Naruto sauntered (1) over to where Sasuke was sitting and slid into the chair next to him, he swivelled in the chair to face Sasuke, "Hi!…erm…Sasuke is it? I hope we can be friends "

Sasuke stared at the angel before him, before a smirk slipped onto his lips, he lent forward to whisper in Naruto's ear, his lips brushing against it as he spoke

"oh…I have a feeling we will"

Naruto shivered in delight then gulped

_Oh shit! 30 student's in a class and I sit next to the crazzie!_

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(1) not really, he just walked XD

OH GOODNESS I HATE IT!

*runs to the emo corner*

So? Tell me what you thought? I can't wait to hear from you ( I'm going to assume that someone read it XD ) I live for Input, If you have a request tell me and I'll try to fit it in, reviews are love! Flames will be used to heat my house.


	2. Is EVERYONE here crazy?

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Oh My Someone ACTUALLY read it! You have no idea how high I Am now!

I just read my reviews and they have spurred me into action!!! So here's the next chapter!! X3

Big, warm fuzzy thank you's go to **Alternative Angel **- thankies! **MissPumpkinHead **- thank you! **Sinfalcon** - thank you! You must have clicked almost every button in the review box! I promise to do better with the format thingy! **YowithRenoYo** - cheers! **Ravenna's Soul **- thank you! **Ryomarox **- I love your idea! defiantly doing it! And don't worry I hate M/F too! I'm thinking Gaara or Kiba :3 **XxNaruto-SasukexX **- your name is win! :D **Eovin **- thanking you kindly :3 **Sango92 **- merci! **loveletta **- origato!

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing, if I did, Sakura would be dead…..

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? with the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, lets hope so.

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! ON WITH THE FIC!

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Chapter two: Is EVERYONE here crazy?

Somewhere deep in the heart of Konoha boys school….ok so it was a store room, sue me, the Akatsuki, a group of misfit teen's brought together by there love of red, black and manga,

are plotting.

Plotting evil things.

Plotting evil devious, toe curling…

"so the Akatsuki are agreed that purple is this years nail colour?"

Ok so, maybe not toe curling or devious, but purple is evil damn it! evil!

"Agreed!"

"Ok on to the next item, who watched the recommended death note episode? And please raise your hand if you think Light Yagami needs a hair cut?"

Hands around the room began to raise while the blonde blue eyed…boy? Counted them and wrote them down.

"Deidara! Deidara! Deidara!"

"urg…Yes Tobi?"

An excitable black haired boy, with black and red buttons instead of the uniform grey on his blazer stood up.

"oh oh! have you seen the cute blonde chibi that just transferred to class 11D?"

Murmurs of delight swiftly spread around the room.

"Order! Order!…now" Deidara smiled a smile that reeked of fan boy "tell me more about this…Blonde of yours…"

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Naruto practically ran to his first lesson. Sasuke had been flirting, none too subtly, for the whole of form, he was starting to think the blush that had found it's way onto his cheeks was permanent. He quickly, as to not be attacked by a certain raven haired pervert, found his science room and preceded to open the door, only to bump into a firm warm chest. Naruto slowly lifted his head to met a pair of deep emerald eyes, the eyes were attached to a lean body, topped with crimson hair with a tattoo that was kanji for love on the right side of his forehead. Two words. Sex and God. Naruto felt his blush coming back full force.

"Hey kid, do you mind?"

And just like that, the blush was gone.

_Oh hells no!_

"who the hell do you think your calling a kid! I'm the same age as you!"

"hn, whatever, move it, your blocking traffic"

And with those charming parting words he pushed past Naruto and disappeared into the crowd of students.

Since it was Naruto's first lesson he had to report to the teacher of the class. He made his way over to the teachers desk to talk to the tall pale man with long black hair located there.

"erm…excuse me?"

Curious yellow eyes glanced upwards,

"can I help you?"

"Ah, yes my names Naruto and this is my first day…"

"ah of course the head told me about you, go take a seat next to Kiba and we'll begin"

"oh, ok great, just one problem…"

"yes?"

"who's Kiba?"

The teacher, who Naruto had identified as Mr. Orichimaru from his timetable, smiled slightly before screaming,

"KIBA!!"

Naruto jumped out of his skin, for a skinny guy he sure had some pipes.

A boy with shaggy brown hair whipped his head around and locked eyes with the blonde, a feral grin sliding on to his tattooed face. The boy had two upside down red triangles on either cheek, black slits encased in white for eyes, and sharp canniness'.

_He looks kinda like…a dog._

"ah good, now that I have your attention, Kiba, this is Naruto, he will be sitting next to you for the rest of the term"

"fine by me" kiba growled out, taking Naruto by the wrist and pulling him too his chest.

Kiba then leaned down to meet Naruto's eye level, him being slightly taller, and practicly purred,

"_very _fine"

Naruto panicked and started hitting his fists on the taller boys chest,

_Great, first the bastard a the door, and now I'm being molested, I MISS SASUKE! At least he didn't grope me!…Much…_

"le…let go!"

"hmmm ya'know I don't think I will"

Kiba's hand slid round to Naruto's ass, giving it a firm squeeze

"KYAA!"

_IS EVERYONE IN THIS SCHOOL CRAZY?!_

"Huh…it's tight, you must be a virgin"

Naruto's eyes grew wide

_Apparently so_

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Sasuke strolled leisurely to his first lesson, he had spent the whole of form feeling up his little fox and was, needless to say in a very good mood, Naruto's cheeks had been stained with a blush that had turned him on like crazy. Ahh yes, life was indeed perfect. Sasuke reached his science room door, he was a little late but he had A*'s in everything (1) and was thoroughly prepared for his exams, he was not prepared however, to open the door to find his blond angel being groped by some two-bit mongrel! With a smirking teacher watching the whole fiasco, humour evident on his face.

"let me go bastard!"

"oh I love it when you talk dirty to me"

"argh!"

Sasuke felt his murderous intent rising, no one, and I mean _no one _touched what belonged to him, ok so _technically _the blonde wasn't his in body, but he was his in mind and to Sasuke

that's all that mattered.

"Get. Your. Filthy. Hands. Off. _My_. Blond!"

Sasuke sprinted to where the two boys were and ripped Naruto out of Kiba's grasp.

"hey? What the hell Uchiha?!"

" I swear to God Inuzuka touch him again and you'll wish you were born female!"

Kiba was about to reply when he was silenced by a level 5 Uchiha death glare. Strong enough to make a grown man cry. Defeated, Kiba slunk to his chair.

Sasuke stared down into Naruto's eyes, he was so unique, so perfect. He tilted his head and leant down to claim the blonds lips when…

"Mr. Uchiha if you don't mind I _do _have a biology (2) class to teach"

_Damn_

Sasuke dragged the blonde to sit next to him at his table, Mr. Orichimaru chuckling slightly to himself while they took their seats.

_Grrr, don't worry naru, I'll get you my pretty, and that little dog to!_

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(1) no pressure there then

(2) lolz Orichimaru teaching biology, who let that man near children?

Ok so the usual, read review, give me constructive criticism but flames will be used to melt chocolate into mild to be given to all the nice reviewers :D if you have any requests like **Ryomarox **did then don't hesitate to ask, also if you have any pointers like **Sinfalcon** did, I welcome them with open arms! R and R!!

See you soon CoCoBookmark


	3. PH3AR THE UZUMAKI FAN BOYS!

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Hey everyone! I'm back with a brand new chapter! Once again I was working super specially awesomely hard to meet your needs! Big thank you's to everyone who reviewed and what not! **Lady Amalia **- your new I see nice to meet you hope you enjoy! **Eovin** - thanks a bunch! **MissPumpkinHead **- Proof that patience is a useless virtue! the kiss is for you! **Dobby123 **- thanks! **Acedia-et-Avaritia **- cheers! **Spyke10100** - Who only reviewed because he's my brother and I forced him to! **kasai chii **- I see you are also new, hope you like the new chappie! **sango92 **- origato! **spEilbErg **- Thanks for reading! **sharingon-sasu-kun **- hello newbie! Hope you enjoy! **Minata **- another new one I see! Have fun! **blueberry **- although your review was anonymous I really appreciate it! Make sure you get an account soon! There worth it! **gingersnapkitty **- I love ginger snaps XD hope you enjoy! **Willemina15 **- thankies! **Cheshire **- for spell checking my work! You rock for that! And last but not least **Alternative Angel **- your reviews make me smile!

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing, if I did, Orichimaru would be a cabaret dancer!

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? with the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, lets hope so.

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! ON WITH THE FIC!

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Chapter three: PH3AR THE UZUMAKI FAN BOYS!

Naruto made his way to where he was told the library was, It was break, and boy did he need one! Mr. Orichimaru had decided it would be beneficial to the class if sasuke were to point out all the bones on the human body while using Naruto as a live model. Two hours of being groped by a raven headed pedo was _NOT_ on the agenda! But I was worth it to see the look on Kiba's face! If sasuke hadn't…

_Sasuke…_

For some reason the thought of the taller boy brought a blush to his face. He allowed a small smile to slip onto his lips while thoughts of onyx eyes and duck but hair flitted behind his eyes.

"Hey, you new here?"

Naruto spun around to se a boy with long brown hair and pale lilac eyes with no pupils.

_Ok, that's kinda creepy…_

"oh, yes I am, It's my first day!"

"hn"

"that's not even a word!"

"…hn"

"what? Is there some secret bastard language that I don't know about? First that red head calls me a kid now this…"

Like a flash The boy was behind Naruto wrapping his arms around his waist.

"you should be careful what you say. You might hurt someone's feelings Na-ru-to"

The boy let go and began to walk away, while Naruto spluttered indignantly

"urg, uh, wha? BASTARD!"

The boy stopped to face Naruto.

"Neji"

"what was that bastard?"

"Neji, my name, is Neji."

And with that he continued on his way

"Neji huh? Wait a second, HOW THE HELL DO YOU KNOW MY NAME?"

Naruto carried on walking in the direction he was headed before he was confronted by that Neji person. Honestly! Could he not go anywhere without being molested. Urgh! Well at least now he wasn't as bad as that Kiba guy, he was just plain scary! But he had to admit out off all the perverts he had encountered so far, Sasuke was the best! Rescuing from Kiba had defiantly put him in his good books. Naruto was so absorbed in his thinking he didn't realise he had reached the library till he heard voices coming from inside it.

"Worship the penny un!"

"hey Tobi, I asked the penny if you were gonna die in 5 minuets and it said yes!"

"No! Tobi cant die! Tobi is a good boy!"

"wait, did you mean dead as in lack of a pulse un, or dead as in orgasm un?"

"Deidara since when has dead meant orgasm?"

"It did is William Shakespeare's time un!"

"It's the 21st century!"

"Just answer the question un!"

"Fine, forgive me Tobi, you wont die you'll just spontaneously orgasm!"

"excuse me?"

Three sets of eyes turned to the door to see an extremely red in the face Naruto standing in the doorway.

_Uh, I better move, usually when I stand in doorways it leads to molestation. _

"OMG IT'S THE BLOND CHIBI!"

_I fucking new it!_

Naruto barely had time to remember his own name before he was being pounced upon by the three older teens.

"come Akatsuki! We must make him fabulous!"

"Yosh! Tobi is a good boy, can Tobi do his hair!?"

"hush Tobi, were in a library un!"

"Oh right, Sorry Deidara"

"quick I hear someone coming!"

"lets go un!"

_Oh god! Where's the possessive bastard when you need him!?_

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Sasuke walked down the hall in search of his blonde angel. He had disappeared for the rest of the day after break, whenever a lesson began, an Akatsuki member, that weird club his older brother belonged too, would come in with a note explaining Naruto's absence. Sasuke was about to turn a corner when he spotted his classmate, Neji Hyuuga.

"Hyuuga"

"Uchiha"

"hey, you haven't seen a cute blonde with whisker marks on his cheeks have you?"

Neji smirked, had he ever.

"yeah I saw your brother and his lackeys dragging him to storage, why?"

Sasuke's heart nearly stopped beating, key word being almost, no way was he leaving the Uchiha estate to his fruit loop of an older brother. Itachi had his blonde. Damn that nail polish wearing lady boy!

"where?"

"south wing"

Sasuke was off like a shot, skidding round corridors and breaking every safety regulation ever set by the school. He was just about to turn a corner when he bumped into a much smaller body, sending them flying to the floor, sasuke on top of whoever it was. Sasuke was just about to open his eyes and `hn' at whoever he had landed on, because Uchiha's didn't apologise either, when he heard the body below him say his name. he opened his eyes only to be met with his blonde fox's sky blue ones.

"Naruto?"

"Sasuke! My hero!"

The smaller boy griped onto his shirt and buried his head in sasuke shoulder.

"Save me Sasuke! save me from the crazy fan boys!, they have t-shirts, T-SHIRTS! And a shrine of my face! Made out of bubblegum!"

Sasuke pulled back his head to get a good look at the blonde before picking them both up of the floor. Sasuke set Naruto down on his feet and stared into his eyes.

"sasu…muph!"

Sasuke pressed his lips to Naruto's in a bruising kiss, liking at the smaller boys lips begging for entrance. Naruto stood still for a moment before shyly opening his lips, allowing Sasuke into his mouth, the brunettes tongue memorising every curve and dip. Involuntary moans slipped from his mouth, but this only spurred Sasuke on more. When they finally parted, Naruto was panting and sasuke was smirking.

"hey?"

Naruto looked up with hazy eyes.

"Wanna go out sometime?"

"will you protect me from the fan boys?

"always"

Naruto grabbed Sasuke by the cheeks, pulling him in for a quick kiss before pulling away.

"Take me Sasuke Uchiha I'm yours!"

"I know"

"What?"

"nothing, need a lift home?"

"sure"

They started walking and Sasuke fell into step with Naruto, linking there hands, before looking down.

"Naruto?"

"yeah"

"are you wearing purple nail polish?

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Ok that's chapter three in the bag! Next chapter we see what Naruto's family life is like!

Read, Review, give constructive criticism! Flames will be used to light candles! If anyone has a request feel free to ask and please point out grammar/spelling mistakes when I make them.

Thanks to everyone!

Till next time!

CoCoBookmark


	4. you want to meet him!

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Hello lovely people! I'm Back! Thank you's in the form of big sloppy kisses go to **sango92** - I'm glad you liked it! **MissPumpkinHead** - Don't worry, there's a special place in hell for the inventor of the word tongue :3 **no pressure **- Don't let your mum catch you reading this :S you'll be banned from my house again! **Blueberry **- I'm happy you think so! **fasalla **- your new, hope you enjoy the chapter! **kasai chii **- hello again, tee hee, enjoy! **GothicInuAngel01 **- you are also new I see, Hope you like the update! **Alternative Angel **- another loyal reviewer! Thanks for your review! **Pepito rulz **- nice to meet you XD **spyke10100 **- again, he only reviewed because he's my brother and I forced him too, although the meanness is not welcome baby bro! **loveletta **- thankies! **jenniebennie **- your new as well I see! Hope you like it! **milda **- how dare you make me lose the game! No hairspray for you! And **lilm1991** - for adding me to her favourite authors list about five minuets ago!

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing, if I did, I would force people to read the authors notes because I know none of you do! (I don't either, but that was when I was young an naïve! Now that I myself am an authoress, I shall forever read the authors notes!)

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? with the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, lets hope so.

FREE PUPPIES FOR ALL! ON WITH THE FIC!

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Chapter 4: You want to meet him?

Naruto fumbled about with his keys before sliding them into the lock. What a day. Those crazy Akatsuki people had really done a number on him, he had been exposed to more moisturiser than one boy should in a lifetime. He was thinking of informing the school about all the chemicals they had stored down there, seriously, who need seventy-eight tubs of industrial strength hair dye? He was just stepping through the door when he was bombarded with questions from his over excitable fathers.

"So?!"

"What happened?!"

"Dish the dirt!"

"Oh God kashi tell me you didn't just say dish and dirt in the same sentence."

Naruto stepped around his parents, closing the front door a the same time.

"It was fine, actually, I made a friend, who is…erm…I made a friend!"

Kakashi raised a knowing eyebrow while Iruka looked ecstatic

"Oh my babies all grown up!"

Iruka flung his arms around Naruto's shoulders, squeezing him for all he was worth.

"Daddy…can't…. breath!"

Iruka quickly let go, apologizing to his darling son, while Kakashi's eyes glinted in a way that clearly read _Up To No Good_.

"Are you sure he's _just _a friend?_"_

Naruto's face lit up like a Christmas tree.

"Ha I knew it!"

"DAD!"

"So? Who's the lucky guy?

Naruto stared at his fathers faces, one a mix of mischief and excitement, the other a cross between happiness and what looked like the promise of eternal pain to Naruto's potential suitor.

"His name Is, sa…smamumah."

"what was that Naru dearest?"

"Sas….unuhmuna"

"come again?"

"Sasuke Uchiha!"

Naruto buried his face in his hands before groaning.

"Daddy Kashi your so embarrassing!"

"that's mah job!"

Iruka found that moment appropriate to interrupt his white haired, mask wearing lover.

"So when is this…Sasuke coming over?"

"Uh…I dunno I'll ask I guess"

Iruka's happy face suddenly looked panic stricken.

"Naru, did anyone say anything about…"

He lifted his hand to stroke his son's cheek. Naruto tilted his head to meet the hand halfway.

"No actually no one did, almost everyone there has some sort of tattoo or facial marking so I was…normal"

Naruto looked up to meet Iruka's eyes, and for the first time in his schooling life, the smile he sent them reached his eyes.

Iruka almost cried, and If it wasn't for the sudden arrival of his husbands hand within his own, he would have.

"I'm gunna go change then, oh I almost forgot, I had an unfortunate fabulising accident and now my underwear's pink! Ok gotta go!"

Naruto bolted up the stairs, smile and all while Iruka turned to his partner with watering eyes.

"He finally got accepted love"

Kakashi pulled down his mask and planted a chaste kiss on the smaller mans lips.

"lets go make dinner"

Iruka sniffled.

"Okay"

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_Meanwhile in the Uchiha household…_

"NO BABY BROTHER NO!"

"GET BACK HERE ITACHI! I'LL TEACH YOU TO TOUCH WHAT'S MINE!"

"but baby brother he was all cute and chibilicious!"

"so you felt the need to kidnap him?!"

"It's the penny's fault! It told us to!"

"DAMN YOU AND YOUR LYING PENNY!"

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The next morning Naruto woke bright and early, much to his dismay, completely unprepared for the day ahead. His parents wanted to meet his boyfriend', he inwardly groaned.

_Good morning, let the stress begin…_

He arrived at school and started to make his way to his for room, according to his timetable they had a sexual education talk in science today.

_Joy._

Naruto entered the classroom to see another boy, wearing a long coat that covered half his face and large sun glasses that hid his eyes, sitting in the chair by the window, not wanting to seem rude, he went and sat next to him. The boy turned to face him.

"hello"

"hi"

"hello"

"erm…hi?"

"hello!"

"quit it your creeping me out!"

"huh, that's two more hello's than people usually last!"

The strange boy held out his hand.

"My names Shino, wanna be friends?"

"erm…sure!"

The boy named Shino smiled, at least it looked like he smiled, but Naruto couldn't really see anything through the coat.

Just then the bell decided to ring and students started pilling in. one of them being sasuke.

Naruto blushed at the sight of the raven. While the raven in question just smirked and walked over.

"hello Naru, miss me?"

He punctuated his sentence with a lick to the ear. Naruto shivered then moaned quietly.

"Sa…Sasuke"

"hmm?"

Sasuke made his way down to Naruto's neck.

"My…ugh…my parents want to, ohh meet you!"

Sasuke looked up briefly before carrying on with the hicky.

"Okay" He mumbled.

"how about after school toady?"

"su…sure"

Sasuke pulled away, smiling before taking his sea next to Naruto.

"What subject are we doing in science today?"

"Sexual education, why?"

Sasuke's smirk came back full force.

"no reason…"

"Welcome class! My name is Mr. Jiraiya and I'll be your sexual education teacher!"

The strange white haired man started too pass books around the class.

"please turn to page 37 in your `how to' manual and I'll explain where babies come form!"

Naruto looked down at the book called Itcha Itcha paradise before turning to the aforementioned page.

_A man and a woman! that's just disgusting!_

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Deidara and itachi sat in there A level art class finishing off there final projects. Tobi had been fiddling about with a box for the last five minuets muttering to himself about deceiving rubbers.

"psst, Itachi?"

Itachi's eyebrow twitched.

"psst, Deidara?"

"leave me alone I'm trying to be creative un!"

Deidara carried on with his clay sculpture of a bird.

"psst! Deidara!!! Itachi!!!"

They both reluctantly looked over a very exited Tobi.

"although this may LOOK like blue tack, its actually a rubber!

"Tobi" itachi stated calmly.

"yes Itachi?"

"shut up!"

"UN!"

"YOU GUY'S ARE MEAN TO TOBI!"

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"And then the man thrusts his penis into the ladies vagi…"

Mr. Jiraiya was interrupted by the alarm signalling it was time for break.

"darn, I guess were out of time, see you next week everybody!"

The whole class let go of a breath they didn't realise they had been holding when the teacher left the room. Even mister Orichimaru looked ill. He turned the class and announced

"what a perv!"

Naruto was heading out of his science classroom when heard a cry of,

"There's the blonde chibi! Get him!"

Turning he saw a group of older teens with black and red doted all around there uniform, looking at him with unabashed fanboyisum.

_Oh crap! Sasuke where are you?_

When the gaggle of teens started to advance on him Naruto ran. He flew down the hall and hid himself in an empty classroom.

_Few safe!_

Naruto turned around only to come face to face with an equally frightened girl, wait this was on all boys school, and she was wearing the uniform, it was a guy?!? He had long dark brown hair and brown eyes, his lips were full and he looked as if he had just been running.

"hey, you being chased two?"

The femme-boy turned to face him.

"yeah, I was running from my fan boy, Zabuza"

"I see, you too huh?"

"yeah, sometimes I think `fan boy' is on the requirements list to get into this school!"

"I know right! And what's with all the bastards?"

"so you met Gaara then". It was a statement. Not a question.

"the red head?"

The boy looked at Naruto with a blank face." Yup, you met Gaara."

"hey what's your name?"

"oh right, sorry, my names…"

Suddenly the door was wrenched open and a very horny looking masked teen was standing in the doorway.

"Haku! My love! I found you!"

Haku sweat dropped anime style. The large masked boy picked him up before tossing him over his shoulder.

"come on sugar puff it's sexy time! Ow! chi ka chi ka!"

The larger boy turned and started to walk out of the classroom.

"AHH! Uh, Buy..?"

Naruto ran out of the classroom to shout after the other boy.

"NARUTO!"

"BYE NARUTO!"

"BYE HAKU!…Huh he seems nice…"

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Ok guys you know the drill!

Next chapter Sasuke meets Naruto's parents! If anyone has a request then I'll be glad to put it in! also I live for reviews!

Oh, and please tell me if you think my chapters are too short!

Till next time!

CoCoBookmark!


	5. Of Bushy Brows and Bowl cuts!

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Hi Guys! Here's another chapter just for you! Chapter 5! that's 4 more chapters than I thought I'd write! Well once again big thank you's go to **jenniebennie **- thank you! **Pepito rulz **- thanks!

**n0-pressure **- you know what you did! **natsukileeRKOlover **- welcome! Hope you enjoy! **kasai chii **- thankies! **Toyosi **- great now everyone knows I'm a Uke! **MissPumpkinHead **- It was random lol! And It did make sense, sorta! **spyke10100 **- my baby brother! **hollowsmile **- another new reviewer! Yay! **Voldemort's my favourite riddle **- lol I get it, Tom Riddle right?

**WhiteRabbitLSD **- another new reviewer! I feel loved! I was thinking this chapter could be tilting more toward the GaaLee side of the spectrum! Enjoy!

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing, if I did, Hinata would be a lesbian.

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? with the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, lets hope so.

SCREW THE RULES I HAVE GREEN HAIR! ON WITH THE FIC!

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Chapter 5: Of bushy brows and bowl cuts….

Naruto and Sasuke made their way up the driveway that, in Naruto's eye's lead to certain doom, to Sasuke it was where his future in-laws lived.

"Sasuke, are you sure about this? I mean my parents are kinda….different…"

"How so love?"Naruto sighed.

"You'll see"

He pulled out his key's and opened his front door, stepping inside he started to search for his MIA parents.

Sasuke started to follow when he was pulled into a dark room to the side of the kitchen. Everything was pitch black till a light was suddenly shone in his eyes and he found he was tied to a chair in what looked like a coat cupboard.

"So…"

Said a white haired man wearing a mask that cover one eye.

Another man with brown hair pulled back into a spiky pony tail stepped out of the shadow while snapping a rubber glove over his hand.

"You must be the boyfriend…"

Naruto was just about to make his way back down the stairs when he heard an ear piercing scream coming from around the store cupboard. He took the stairs two at a time, only to find a petrified Sasuke and two very smug looking fathers.

"Sasuke?….."

"So many words……so many long descriptive words!"

Sasuke buried his face in Naruto's blazer.

"They had pictures Naru! Pictures!"

Naruto sent a very pissed look at his fathers who had the decency to look ashamed. Well. Iruka did.

"I told you they were different…"

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Gaara Sabaku slowly made his way the sports hall for P.E. he didn't mind P.E so much since he usually scared all the teachers into giving him A*'s anyway. He smirked to himself.

_It's just too easy._

Gaara was walking into the hall when he was attacked by a green blur.

"OH MY GOODNESS! I'm awfully sorry my fellow youthful student!"

Gaara's turquoise eyes proceeded to stare daggers at the one who knocked him, only to find it had no effect.

_What the hell?_

"I promise to be more careful next time! YOSH! GOODBYE YOUTHFUL NEW FRIEND!"

And just like that the blur was gone. Gaara entered the hall and took his seat next to a paler than usual sasuke.

"Forgive me father for I have sinned"

Sasuke turned to face Gaara.

"How so?"

"I'm in love with a boy who has a bowl cut!"

Sasuke stared blankly a Gaara before replying.

"I'll prey for you…"

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Itachi Deidara and Tobi sat around a small table in the library whispering to each other.

"so, your brother's dating the blonde chibilicious fantabmarised one un?"

Itachi nodded.

"Indeed"

"Good! We have an inside man un!"

"Erm, I don't think he's gunna go for that…"

"Tobi has an idea!"

"What's that un?"

"Remember for sasori's birthday party when we all wore Lolita dresses?"

Itachi and Deidara looked at each other, a plan formulating in there heads.

"Well fuck…"

"Me…"

"Sideways!"

"Tobi you're a genius!"

"YOSH!…What's a genius?"

Deidara and itachi sweat dropped.

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Sasuke and Gaara walked side by side on there way to there English class, Naruto had opted to walk with his new friend Haku since he hadn't gotten much time to talk to him last time they met, and were slightly lagging behind the two seme's.

"So Sabaku, you thought of how your gunna seduce him yet?"

"Well, he's very…_youth _driven so I was thinking tactic number 27 and 39?"

"Chase and capture mixed with full frontal…nice"

Gaara smirked.

"I thought so…"

"Wait, what's that got to do with being youthful?"

The boys entered the classroom, Naruto and Haku not far behind.

"Beats the heck outa me…hey, you banged the kid yet?"

"You just crossed the line!"

Gaara turned to see Naruto behind him. Livid.

"There is no line…"

Sasuke decided to break this up before someone died.

"Uh… come on naru baby I think there's two empty seats in that secluded corner over there!"

Gaara smirked at his friends obvious cowardice. Looking around the room he noticed the only seat left was next to a certain bushy browed boy.

_Perfect…_

Gaara made his way over and slid into the seat like silk.

"Hello…I'm sorry I don't think I caught your name earlier.."

The boy's face lit up.

"Lee! Rock Lee! And your Gaara! I know because I watch you run cross country all the time! You're my idol!"

Gaara smirked, leaning forwards.

"Really?"

Lee blushed.

"Ye…yes, erm, Gaara."

He smiled.

_I could get used to that smile…_

A cough from the teacher brought his attention to the front of the class.

"Ok guys! Today were gunna start a project!"

Que multiple groans from the class.

"Now now none of that! You get to pick your partners this time!"

Que murmurs of approval from the class.

"So pair up and get started! It's an oral (1) report on anything you like! Marks will be awarded for originality and language."

Gaara turned to Lee.

"Wanna be partners?"

Lee blushed again.

"Sure!"

Oh yes Gaara had a good feeling about this, a very good feeling.

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(1) lol oral XD

Sorry the chappie so short! Don't shot me! Blame Bexley Manga Network! They make me go!

Lolz! Anyway the usual! Review! Criticize! Make comments! Make requests! Make demands!

No flames please, my fragile little heart can't take them! XD

If anyone wants to request a couple please feel free!

Love CoCoBookmark!


	6. In which there is Shakespeare and doom…

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Hello all! YOSH! Chapter 6 is here!

I AM SO SORRY! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! I'M A BAD AUTHORESS! AHH! I HAD WRITERS BLOCK, I SWEAR IT WAS ME AGAINST THIS LAUGHING BRICK WALL!! BUT! I PREVAILED! AND ON TOP OF THAT, ITS HALF TERM AND I SPENT MOST OF IT AWAY FROM THE INTERNET!! But there really is no excuse, and I'm sorry for my lateness.

…ok well thanks go to the usual, **jenniebennie** - thanks for reviewing! **MissPumpkinHead** - who has read and reviewed ALL of my chapters! I am not worthy of such a super special awesome reviewer. **Amsj **- another new reviewer! YOSH! **GEMMAS IN THE HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!! **+**MEME AGAIN (GEMMA) **+**DO I HAVE TO TEL YOU ITS GEMMA** +**AGAIN ITS ME GEMMA**+ **gemma you Know its me XD **= all the same person! Thanks for reading gems! **Blueberry** - glad you like it XD **Moonlight Harmony **- thankies! **Alternative Angel **- another loyal reviewer! **Pepito rulz **- thank you! **machiko** - cheers mate! **Sinfalcon **- I fan girl squealed when I read your review! I was like "They like it! They really really like it!" **sango92** - Don't worry about how long it took you to review! The fact that you read my story at all makes me all warm and fuzzy inside, like a kitten! **hiya couldn't find a name **- hello! New reviewers make me hyper whoop! **kittydeidara **- thanks fro reading! **Belward4ever **- thank you!**Suki Nightstar **- thankies! **hanakisa **- I'm really glad you like it! And **spike10100** - who actually wanted to review this time! I didn't have to force him!

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing, if I did, I'd give lee a haircut!

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? with the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, lets hope so.

I'M HERE TO WRITE FANFICTION AND DRINK CUPS OF TEA…AND I'M ALL OUT OF TEA!

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Chapter 6: In which there is Shakespeare and doom…

"Ok guys! Today were gunna start a project!"

Naruto groaned along with the rest of the class.

"Now now none of that! You get to pick your partners this time!"

_Huh! that's no to bad!_

Naruto turned to Sasuke.

"Hey sasuke? Did you hear? We can pick our own partners! Wanna pair with me?"

Sasuke smiled.

"Sure"

The two boys attention was then drawn back to the front of the class when the teacher continued talking.

"So pair up and get started! It's an oral (1) report on anything you like! Marks will be awarded for originality and language."

"So Sasuke what do you wanna do it on?"

Sasuke stared blankly at Naruto.

"The table, the stairs, the sofa, the desk, the floor, the _OUCH_!"

Naruto glared at Sasuke, before turning to face the wall mumbling about perverted boyfriends.

When the class ended Naruto and Sasuke were pulled up to the front of the class by the teacher.

"Hello boys! Well as you both know Naruto is new here, and hasn't had the same advantages that the rest of the year have! So far he's running a grade below the rest of the class So! I was wondering, and I assumed by the googly eyes you two were giving each other… "

At this point the teacher smirked at a blushing Naruto and a Sasuke who was avoiding eye contact like the plague.

"It wouldn't be a problem, if Sasuke could tutor you during the project?"

The two boys looked at each other, before turning to the teacher, one grinning the other with a look that clearly read 'Doom`.

"Yes sir, I would love too, come on Naru-love!"

And thus a very pale Naruto was dragged out of the room by an ecstatic Sasuke.

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"Okay itachi! Grab the fox ears! Tobi, the black and orange lace! And I!"

At this point the blond span around in a circle, whirling a yellow fox's tail above his head.

"Will prepare the dress!"

"Naru-chibi is gunna look so cute!"

"I know un!"

"What time are you brother and the chosen one arriving?"

"Around four"

The blonde gasped dramatically.

"Then there is not much time! Hurry my minions!"

Two sets of eyes turned to the blonde.

"…Err…Companions! I meant companions!"

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Sasuke walked Naruto the door, wary all the time of his psycho of an older brother. He had yet to tell Naruto that his No1 fan boy was also his brother in law to be. After all, it was not something you brought up in a casual conversation about the weather, not that they ever had casual conversations about the weather, no, Sasuke had found a much more productive way of using his mouth when around the blonde, but still.

Sasuke opened the door and ushered the blonde in. Alert and crouched in a fighting stance.

"Okay naru, very,_ very _quietly, sneak up to my room, I'll check if the coast is clear"

"Sasu?"

"Yes love?"

"Why are you whispering?"

"Ah, well, you see, the thing is…"

A loud thump was heard from the floor above.

"SASUKE?! IS THAT YOU?! WHERE ART THOU BABY BROTHER?!"

"I think it would be a better idea if we went to your house!"

"Sasu what are talking about? Who is that? You have a brother?! Can I meat him?"

"NO!"

"Aww! Why?"

Itachi appeared at the bottom of the stairs along with two others that Naruto recognised very well.

"That's why!"

"Ahh! Fan boys!"

"Stay calm Naru-chibi!"

"We come in peace un!"

"Don't be afraid Naru-chibi! Tobi is a good boy!"

"We just wanna play with you!"

"ITACHI!"

"REPHRASING!!! We would like to give you a make over!"

"Err…..?"

"…What kind of makeover?"

"Sasuke!!"

"The Lolita kind "

"He's all yours!"

"Say wha?"

Deidara Tobi and Itachi Fan boy squealed.

"Come on Naru! Its Fabulisation time!"

"Naruto I think I just found our English project!"

"what?! No!"

"Please Naru-love…For me?"

"oh fine! But no lip-gloss!"

"So you'll do it? Like, willingly?"

"yes…"

The three fan boys and his Boyfriend looked ecstatic.

"I rule!"

"Alright baby bro!"

"Result un!"

"Tobi is a good boy!"

"I'm Doomed!"

Naruto was lead up to Sasuke's room, with his own personal rain cloud hanging over his head, a great contrast to the rainbows that seemed to sparkle over everyone else's.

"Ok, I!…"

Sasuke gave a pointed look at his brother.

"Will get Naru dressed, You!"

He looked now at the others.

"Will stay outside"

The three older teens pouted.

"Spoil sport un!"

"Oh hush, come on naru!"

Sasuke opened his bedroom door and began to drag him inside.

"Doomed! Doomed! Doomed!"

The door was slammed shut before Itachi and the others had a chance to enter.

"Well…That went well…"

Naruto sat down on Sasuke's bed and examined the black and orange lace Lolita situated there.

"You know"

He said after careful deliberation.

"Its not that bad…"

"I know, now get over here and let me take your pants off!"

"Yes sir! But touch my boxers and you're a dead man get it?"

"Got it!"

"Good!"

Three sets of ears pasted themselves to the door of Sasuke's bedroom.

"Do you think there gunna have sex un?"

Itachi looked thoughtful for a minute before a horrified shriek came from the other side of the door.

"Sasuke let go of that!!!"

Itachi blinked.

"If Sasuke gets his way…"

"Kya! Sto-stop it! That tickles!"

"Possibly"

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**MissPumpkinHead! Turn back now!!! GaaLee moment**

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Lee stopped outside the door to a rather large detached house.

"Gaara, are you sure I'm allowed round your house? Your parents wont find?"

Gaara chuckled lightly.

"I doubt it…"

Lee looked relived.

"Oh good!"

_Yes, very good Lee._

They walked through the door together and hung there coats on the banister.

"Ok! My youthful partner, what should we do our project on?"

"I was thinking Shakespeare?"

"Yosh! Can we do Romeo And Juliet?"

Gaara smirked.

"that sounds like a wonderful idea Lee, how about we do a role-play of there first meeting?"

"sure! Wait…don't they…"

Lee blushed.

"…Kiss? In that scene? I don't think I'll be very good at that!"

Gaara stepped towards lee before dipping his head down till there lips were millimetres apart, his breath ghosting over his lips.

"well then, we better practise…"

He softly placed his lips onto Lee's.

"before we perform in front of the class hm?"

Gaara pulled back and smirked down at a dazzled Lee.

"Uh-Uhn wha?"

"unless…you'd prefer a different play?"

Lee looked at Gaara's face and was shocked to notice the vulnerability shown there. Decision made, he mustered all his courage and stepped towards Gaara.

"No…"

He lent upwards and placed his lips onto the taller boys, his voice dropping to a whisper.

"I think I like this scene…."

He rested his hands on his shoulders, and looked up to meet his emerald gaze.

"A little too much…"

His hands slipped up to cup the back of his neck.

"to stop now"

He pulled Gaara down and locked there lips in a soft, yet demanding kiss. When he pulled away he saw Gaara smile, really smile, and he felt a warmth spread through his chest. Gaara was the first to break the spell.

"Well then…Romeo and Juliet it is…"

A grin broke out over Lee's face.

"YOSH!"

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(1) I like that word a little to much XD

Again I'd like to apologise for the lateness of this update!

*doges Kit Kats thrown at her from the readers*

I hope you like it!

Do the usual! R+R! make demands! Give me pointers! Anything you like, no flames please, they will just be used to feed the fire of my Yaoi fangirlisum

CoCoBookmark


	7. Project

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Hello all! CoCoBookmark here! Giving you another yummy update! I would like to apologise again for my lateness! My family and I have noticed that when I don't update I'm really moody and rude and I cry over nothing XD, go figure. So apparently I was unbearable for the two weeks I didn't update! Basically I _HAVE_ to update for the sake of my heath! ANYWAY! Rocky horror picture show style thank you's go to! **Pepito rulz **- thanks! **Hpbecky04** - thankies! I see your new! I hope you keep reading and reviewing! **Trixie101** - I'm not sure if your new but I've never seen you before so welcome! **DanceWithMeUntilSunrise** - your DEFIANTLY new! Thanks! **SkyglazingMaro** - another new one! Woot! Thanks! **Sango92** - now you I remember! Thanks sango! **Sinfalcon** - I went on your deviant art! So cool! LOLZ Deipod! XD **MissPumpkinHead** - I'm so grateful for all your reviews! What started as a simple authoress/reviewer relationship has quickly morphed into some sort of friendship :D GO US! WE RULE! **MyKissofDeath** - I read your stories! Your on my author alert thingy and everything! *DIES OF FAN GIRL INDUCED HEART ATTACK* **Jenniebennie** - Thanks Jennie! **hanakisa **- thank you!**Mikarin** - Merci! **Hollowsmile** - thanking ya kindly! **Ladydhampir** - Oh my! All these new reviewers!

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing, if I did, I would invent a jutsu to stop me talking in my sleep 0o apparently I say some rather…embarrassing things…..

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? with the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, lets hope so.

I'M NOT MUCH OF A MAN, BY THE LIGHT OF DAY, BUT BY NIGHT I'M ONE HELL OF A LOVER! ON WITH THE FANFICTION!

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Chapter 7: Project

Several Hours later found Naruto in the middle of his boyfriends room, surrounded by fan boys, wearing fox ears, a tail…And a dress.

A dress!

He didn't think his dignity could handle another hit like this…he was practically being raped of his masculinity! The other blonde in the room, Deidara, was the first to speak up.

"Naruto! You look so cute un!!!"

Itachi turned to face sasuke, proud tears shining in his eyes.

"You did good baby brother…What season should we set the wedding?"

"Well I was thinking Autumn, with the colours and all…"

Naruto looked at his lover and his apparent brother-in-law.

"Do I get a say in this?"

"Of course you do Naru…Would you like a dress or a tux?"

Naruto attempted to bury his face in his hands but was halted when his wrist was grabbed by Tobi.

"Careful You'll smudge your nail varnish!"

_Well, there goes the last of my dignity…_

Naruto sighed.

"Don't we have an English project to do?"

Sasuke stared at his little fox like lover, confusion clear on his pale face.

"were doing it…."

"But its an _oral _report! We have to speak, sticking me in front of the class in a dress does not count"

"No but we could shock the teacher into giving us an A!"

"Not helpful dear"

Deidara looked thoughtful for a moment, a grin making it's way onto his face.

"Itachi and I did ours on love!"

Naruto stared at him

"Love?"

Deidara nodded.

"Yep Love!!! Well teenage love to be precise and whether it can last"

Sasuke and Naruto looked at each other. Both grinning at the other.

"That…might just work! Sasuke! Lets do that!"

"Sure, sound good to me"

"Yay! I can wear pants!"

Sasuke smirked.

_That's what you think!_

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**MissPumpkinHead scroll down GaaLee moment!! Don't read it! WARNING :This scene may cause extreme jealousy toward lee! **

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Gaara stared down at a severely blushing lee.

"Did my heart love till now? forswear it, sight! For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night, If I profane with my unworthiest hand This holy shrine, the gentle sin is this: My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss"

Lee looked down, His cheeks stained pink.

"Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, Which mannerly devotion shows in this; For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss"

Gaara leaned his face towards lee. Smirking.

"Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?"

Lee blushed the colour of Gaara's hair.

"A - A - Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in…"

Gaara leaned even closer.

Lee audibly gulped.

"Prayer…"

Gaara chuckled sadistically.

"Well, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do; They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair."

Lee looked up to meet his partners emerald eyes.

"Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake".

Gaara placed a finger under Lee's chin.

"Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take. Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin…"

He was practically purring by now.

"Is purged."

Lee shivered and closed his eyes.

"Then have my lips the sin that they have took."

Gaara lent down to claim Lee's lips, reluctantly breaking the kiss to say his next line.

"Sin from my lips?"

Gaara trailed his fingers down the sides of Lee's body, smiling when Lee giggled.

"O trespass sweetly urged! Give me my sin again."

Once again Lee found his lips against the other boys in, what he liked to call, _The youthful pass time. _They broke apart and Lee looked up, dazzled and giggling.

"You kiss by the book…"

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**Its safe to look now MissPumpkinHead!, its over…0o…FOR NOW! MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

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"ZABUZA! THIS IS _NOT _WHAT THEY MEANT BY ORAL EXAM!"

"Hush now Haku-muffin! You want a good grade don't you?"

"Stay the hell away from my genitals!"

"Oh I love it when you talk dirty!"

"Where the heck are my parents?!"

"Sweet, naïve Haku, don't you know that in anime the parents are always absent when their only child's chastity is in danger?"

"Curses! H - hey! Get your hands outa there!"

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Shino stared at his partner for English with hidden Smokey eye's. Taking in every aspect about him. Said partner chose that moment to look up.

"Take a picture Shi, it'll last longer…"

"Hn…Hey Kiba? Do you mind if I take my coat off?"

"Huh? Oh, nah go ahead…"

Shino stood swiftly and pulled of his long grey coat, revealing smooth, lips, stunning eyes and a killer body.

Needless to say Kiba drooled, and Shino smirked.

"Take a picture Kiba, It'll last longemhph!"

Unfortunately Shino could not finish this sentence due to Kiba's lips on top of his. When he pulled back Shino was panting and Kiba was looking at anything _but _Shino. That is until shino started to snigger.

"What?"

"Well! If I had known you would have done _that_ I would've taken my coat of a long time ago!!"

The two boys stared at ach other before bursting out with laughter.

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**Please read! Important!**

Ok! Tell me what you think!

I think my writing's getting worse! L please help me!

Same as usual, but I do have a request! Please if you read this chapter, review so I can get an idea of how many people read the chapters.

It doesn't matter if its only one word, just so I can do a count!

Thanks!

CoCoBookmark!


	8. Mr Uzumaki Hatake

Hi guys! I know what you're thinking, "she's doing it again!" but I swear it's not me! I've been banned from writing on weekdays because of my GCSE's, and as much as I'm loath to admit it, my mummy's logic makes sense, I need to focus on them, *SAD FACE* But! Not all hope is lost! Because you see loyal readers…my mother is not home :) oh yes! Breaking the law! Breaking the law! (I hope you know I'm risking my life for you people!) So in the words of some old dead guy…probably the guy who invented the word tongue….while the cats away, the yaoi crazed mice will play! Thanks go to **MyKissofDeath** – thanks for updating 'opposites attract` loved it! **Salvor-chan** – Thanks a million! **Hime-sama** – Thank you so much! **trixie101** – Thank you for reading! **Belward4ever **– Thanks! **Alternative Angel **– A loyal reviewer from the start! Thanks! **MissPumpkinHead** - Practically my best friend on fanfiction :D thanks for everything you do! *BOWS* **sango92 **– thankies! **Pepito rulz **– Thank you! **Sasuke-chan69** – lol…69 :D **hanakisa** – thanking you kindly! **Hollowsmile **– Thanks! **Sprig** – Are you new? If you are, then welcome! **OMGICHANGEDMYNAME **– Now you are new! I would NEVER forget a name that long XD **Moonlight Harmony **– thank you! **SkyglazingMaro **– thankies! **Anime-girl-cutie **– thankies! **Happytwilighttime **– Yes! Another twilightear! We will slowly take over the world! **LaVenDaRxXxHiMaWaRi **- Thanks for reading! And of course **finnally Gemma **+ **A Snickering Gemma **Thanks Gem's but you know if you got an account you wouldn't have to check the website, you'd get an email whenever I update.

**DISCLAIMER: **I recently found out that I scream at Lee, and I quote, "not another bowl cut" in my sleep 0o….yeah… Also I stole most of the project information from Wikipedia :D just so you know!

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? With the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, let's hope so.

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Chapter 8: Mr. Uzumaki - Hatake

"Okay, so what do you think Steinbeck is trying to get across to the reader when Slim turns the light on in the bunkhouse?"

"Err…bunkhouses were dark in the 30's?"

Sasuke gave Naruto a look.

"I mean, it shows how their friendship lights up there life? Or something…"

Sasuke blinked at Naruto.

"What did you say?"

"…It shows how their friendship lights up there life?"

Tears of tired happiness rolled down his face, Uchiha pride be damned! He'd been up here for hours going over that one damned question and Naruto had _finally _said something that would give him a mark on his exam, he could cry if he wanted to!

"..YES! ITACHI! DEIDARA! HE GOT IT!"

A crash of glass was heard from down the stairs along with muffled swears and a few Hail Mary's. Itachi burst the door open and tumbled in, followed by a stunned Deidara, who was the first to speak.

"No fucking way Un!"

Itachi righted himself on the floor before turning to face his brother.

"You're shitting me?"

Sasuke grinned.

"I shit you not!"

Naruto looked between his boyfriend, and his two biggest fans with glee.

"So we can stop?"

Sasuke grinned.

"We can stop…"

Itachi stood up and took his place next to Deidara.

"So…who's up for food?"

Naruto and Deidara threw their hands in the air.

"We are!"

Itachi rolled his eyes.

"Why does that not surprise me?"

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The next day at school students waited nervously in there form rooms. Today was the day there project was due in and most of the students, to be blunt, were wetting their girly knickers. In the back of the classroom Naruto and his newly acquired friend Haku sat, talking in hushed tones about said project, while Sasuke scribbled on a piece of paper.

"What did you decide to do it on Haku?"

Haku blushed the colour of a beetroot.

"Well, I wanted to do it on economics but my partner, Zabuza…"

Naruto's eyes lit up in recognition.

"Fan boy Zabuza?"

"Yeah that's the one! Anyway he wanted to do it on recession, once he got past his `oral means I must rape you for the good of the school' stage…."

Naruto looked at his friend sympathetically.

"You too huh?"

Haku let out a sigh.

"Yes, my God he's relentless! He chased me around my whole apartment! And when he caught me…"

Naruto leaned in expectantly.

"Never mind! So I thought, technically the recession has economics in it so I went along for the ride; it turned out ok actually how about you Naruto?"

"Well first of all my partner, Sasuke…"

Blinking, Haku looked at Naruto.

"Lover boy Sasuke?"

Naruto grinned.

"That's the one! Well he decided to put me in a dress"

Haku swooned.

"Aww! Naru!"

Naruto glared.

"Am I really the only one opposed to the idea of me in a dress? I mean honestly! This is my manliness were talking about here! (1) But yeah, after I explained that the exam was oral, therefore we needed to talk and not cross-dress, Sasuke's brother Itachi…"

"No way! The fan boy is his brother!?"

"Not only is the fan boy his brother, but when we got to his house there were two more waiting to greet me!"

Haku gasped in horror.

"No! What happened? How did you get out alive?"

"It turns out they wanted to, and I kid you not, was to '_fabulise`_ me, and as soon and the words Lolita and fox were mentioned, Sasuke quite happily signed my life away!"

A look of shock crossed Haku's face.

"He _gave_ you to the fan boys!?"

"I know! And to make matters worse he helped them!"

Haku moved to hug his friend.

"Oh Naru! That's awful!"

Nodding Naruto continued.

"At first yeah, but after I gave up, it was really fun! The guy's are actually nice to hang around, you know, when there not kidnapping me and forcibly putting nail varnish on me, I'll introduce you!"

Haku released his friend but stayed close.

"Are you sure it's safe for me to meet fan boys?"

"Under normal circumstances I would say no, but finding out the guy you're in love with has a brother, who in turn has a fan boy army at his disposal who when given the word would attack for you, are _not _normal circumstances"

Just then the bell rang and there English teacher walked in.

"Hello class, I would like to inform you that we have a new teacher in our school and he will be taking this class from now on! So please give a warm Konoha boys school welcome to Iruka Uzumaki Hatake!" (2)

Sasuke looked up from his scribbling and dropped his pen, while Naruto grinned from ear to ear, waving at his father like a mad man.

Haku looked at the smiling waving Naruto, whispering.

"Hey Naru? Do you know him?"

Naruto nodded whispering back.

"Yeah! He's my Daddy!"

Haku looked to Iruka and then back to Naruto.

"Your Dad's a teacher? Cool!"

"No silly! My _Daddy's _a teacher, my _Dad _co - writes Itcha Itcha paradise"

"You have two Dads?"

"Uh-huh!"

Haku smiled.

"That makes sense now, so I take it your Daddy is the woman, and your Dad is the man?"

Naruto giggled.

"Yup!"

There previous teacher coughed and brought the classes attention back to a sheepish looking Iruka at the front of the class.

"So! Mr. Uzumaki-Hatake, who don't you introduce yourself?"

Iruka blushed a bit at being called Mr., but addressed the class anyway.

"Hello everyone, I'm Mr. Uzumaki-Hatake and I'll be your new teacher, some of you may already know me…"

He looked over to his son who waved enthusiastically.

"And I'll be sure to keep an eye on those I think might…."

He gave a pointed look to Sasuke before carrying on.

"…Misbehave…"

Sasuke paled and Naruto chuckled at his Daddy.

_School life just got a hell of a lot more interesting…_

_---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
_

Iruka shuffled the papers on his newly acquired desk.

"Ok class, I've been informed that you had an English project due in today so let's get started! The first people on my list are….Kiba and Shino?"

Kiba stood up and grabbed his partner, dragging him to the front of the class.

"That's us! Were doing our project on wolf spiders"

Iruka smiled.

"Ok then, when you're ready"

Kiba looked over at his partner, taking in his long coat and sunglasses, and taking some small pleasure from the fact that everything under them now belonged to him.

"Well…Wolf spiders are members of the family…big word can't pronounce it, deriving from the Greek words err…wolfus spiderous… meaning "wolf""

He grinned at the class.

"They are robust and agile hunters, and have good eyesight, you know, having eight eyes and all, and they live mostly solitary lives and hunt alone. Some are opportunistic wanderer hunters, pouncing upon prey as they find it or chasing it over short distances. Others lie in wait for passing prey, often from or near the mouth of a burrow…"

Shino smiled at Kiba, although he couldn't see it, and faced the class.

"Like all species, wolf spiders have a primitive body structure, with a head used mainly for eating and breathing, and an abdomen, which carries all the spider's organs, including the spinnerets. Many of the common grey wolf spiders are a mixture of grey's and light browns…"

He looked at Kiba from behind his sunglasses, taking in the grey hoodie and brown, tousled hair of his partner, the other boy noticing his gaze and reciprocating it with just as much intensity.

"…hence the name… This colour scheme camouflages the spider and allows it to creep up on its prey, which is usually insects…"

Kiba licked his lips.

"…And attack it from behind…"  
Shino chuckled sadistically to himself in his head. Either he was going deaf, or Kiba just whimpered.  
"…Although they are subtle, the male's colours consist of more browns than grey's, as this is used for attracting fe-_males_ during courtship"

Kiba practically ran over to his partner and grabbed him by the arm. "I'm very sorry but Shino is required in the bathroom for sexy-time bye!" Kiba dragged a seemingly grinning Shino out of the room.  
Iruka Blinked.

"Are they allowed to do that...?" The class shrugged, and then spoke in unison. "Probably not…" Sighing Iruka turned to the class. "This is gunna be a long day…" Once again the class nodded, speaking as one. "Yup…"

**---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
**

Wolf whistles and cat calls echoed throughout the classroom. Gaara stepped away from Lee and swiveled to face the class. Smirking.

"Thanks for listening" "We hope you enjoyed our youthful display of love!"

A blushing Iruka ushered the two boys into their seats. "Tha-thank you for that most…" "Youthful?" "Indeed, youthful rather sums it up…I believe Haku and Zabuza are next?"

Haku stood fluidly and made his way to the front of the class, joined by Zabuza, who for legal reasons was not permitted to sit next to him.  
Iruka, having now got his blush under control glanced at the two boys.  
"And what will you be doing your report on?"  
Zabuza stepped forwards and wrapped his arms around Haku's waist, causing the boys face to turn a sweet dusted pink.  
"Economics in the recession"

You could practically feel the relief radiating off of Iruka.  
"So no snogging?"  
Zabuza Chuckled and Haku glared at Zabuza  
"Not if I can help it!"  
Iruka giggled.  
_Just like kashi and I when we first met…_

_  
_Haku turned as much as he could while still in Zabuza's grasp.  
"OK… In economics, the term recession describes the reduction of a country's gross domestic product for at least two quarters. The dictionary definition is "a period of reduced economic activity"; some recessions have been anticipated by stock market declines. In Stocks for the Long Run, Siegel mentions that since 1948, ten recessions were preceded by a stock market decline, by a lead time of 0 to 13 months. Although ten stock market declines of greater than 10% in the DJIA were not followed by a recession"  
It was Zabuza's turn to address the class.  
"Causes of recessions are Currency crises, Energy crisis, War, under consumption and Overproduction; the effects of these are, Bankruptcies, Credit crunches, Deflation, Foreclosures and unemployment…"  
Haku smiled.  
"This concludes our project"  
"And remember kids, always use a condom"  
Iruka sweat dropped.  
_Oh yes…this is gunna be a very long day…_

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The end of the day was drawing near, all of the pairs had gone up except Naruto and Sasuke. Iruka smiled at his son before calling them up to the front of the class. "Hey, I'm Naruto and this is Sasuke, and we're doing our presentation on love! Ok! The word _love_ can refer to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from generic pleasure to intense interpersonal attraction…"

He looked over to Sasuke, who looked back and smiled.  
"The word love is both a verb and a noun. Love is not a single feeling but an emotion built from two or more feelings. Anything vital to us creates more than one feeling, and we also have feelings about our feelings, so basically it's complicated!"  
Naruto turned to look at Sasuke. Big mistake, as soon as their eyes met he was stuck, Sasuke smiled softly at him, directing his next words to the blonde.

"As an abstract concept, _love_ usually refers to a deep, ineffable feeling of tenderly caring for another person... this conception of love encompasses a wealth of different feelings, from the passionate desire and intimacy of romantic love… to a nonsexual emotional closeness. Love in its various forms acts as a major facilitator of interpersonal relationships and, owing to its central psychological importance, is one of the most common themes in the creative arts, because it inspires us all…"  
Naruto forgot how to breathe.

_Come on! It's not that hard! You can do it! In out in out in out!  
_"Sa-Sasuke"  
Sasuke chuckled and moved to brush some of Naruto's hair out of his face.  
"It's your turn to speak love…"  
Naruto nodded, keeping eye contact.

"…. Interpersonal love refers to love between human beings. It is a more potent sentiment than a simple _liking_ for another. Such love might exist between family members, friends…and couples"

Iruka decided to intervene, the looks the two were giving each other where the kind that lead to grandchildren, and he would know, Kakashi had the same look in his eyes when he pulled out the adoption form for Naruto.  
"You can sit down now boys…"

The two love birds blinked, breaking the spell that had been cast, before slinking back to their seats.  
"It's almost the end of the day, so I would like to thank you all for making my first day so amusing"  
His mind wandered back to the young man with the bowl cut.  
"Oh! And youthful! My day was youthful!"

"YOSH! MISSION ACOMPLISHED!"  
At that pint the bell decided to go.  
"Have a nice day!"  
The students pilled out of the classroom, saying their goodbyes to their new teacher, Naruto and Sasuke staying behind. Iruka turned to his son.

"Ready to go?"  
"Ugh yeah, one sec"  
Naruto turned to Sasuke, placing his hand on the others cheek and leaning in to brush his blossom coloured lips against Sasuke pale pink ones.  
"I love you…"  
Sasuke looked at Naruto.  
"I love you too…"  
"Aww!"  
Naruto groaned.  
"Daddy! Mood killer or what?"  
Iruka giggled at his son's obvious discomfort.  
"Come on sugar, Dad's waiting for us at home"  
"Kay, bye Sasu…"  
"bye Naru…"

As Naruto left the classroom, Sasuke could only think one thing.  
_I love English!_

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_

(1)You keep telling yourself that…

(2)I wanted to keep Naruto's name Uzumaki, but since Iruka is married to Kakashi, his name is Iruka Uzumaki Hatake, Uzumaki being his given name for this and gaining a double barrel when he married the perv :)

Thanks to everyone who's reading, I would just like to inform you that I will only update on weekends, unless my mum is out and I can sneak a bit of righting in :)  
Ok the usual! Read Review and comment! I tried real hard to make this chapter longer so I hope its okay. Thanks everyone! I'll try and update tomorrow as well, two updates every weekend's not so bad right? Right?!

Love CoCoBookmark


	9. I’m in love!

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This chapter is dedicated to MissPumpkinHead :D even if she reply to my email with ":)" which, by the way, is avoiding the question! XD LOL, you make me laugh.

Hello again! CoCoBookmark here reporting for duty! Thanks go to **Pepito rulz** – Thanks for your review!

**MissPumpkinHead **– I changed my mind! I don't want L to kiss anyone but me! Exclude him from the Gay-off! **Smexy Mau Beasthunter **– thanks! And **hanakisa **– thank you! I would also like to thank everyone who hasn't yet reviewed, don't feel bad if your name isn't here, and still review ok? You have a whole week to do so :) so no rush :D

**DISCLAIMER: **I don't own Naruto, but I do own Deidara…He's my sex slave. :D

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? With the help of a smitten Uchiha as a tutor, let's hope so

Chapter 9: I'm in love!

Uchiha's only had three rules;  
one: don't show humor, for example smiling or laughing,  
two: don't show weakness, so no gasping or blushing,  
and three: Don't embarrass yourself, therefore all dancing, singing or tom foolery was forbidden.  
So when Sasuke' was found skipping around his bedroom giggling like a mad man, throwing petals and singing; "He loves me! He loves me!" over and over again,  
His parents nearly had a heart attack.  
"Sasuke? What are you doing?"  
Sasuke whirled around to face his parents.  
"Err, I can explain!!"  
Fugaku looked at his son.  
"You have an explanation for breaking _every _Uchiha rule in the space of 60 seconds?"  
Sasuke sweat dropped.  
"Well when you put it like _that_…"  
Mikoto hustled around her husband and wrapped her arms around her son.  
"Ignore him sweetie, now tell mummy why you're so happy!"  
"Well…I'm in love!"  
His mother, Mikoto squealed and hugged her son tighter.  
"Oh sasu – dumpling that's Fantastic! Isn't it Fugaku?  
Sasuke's father, Fugaku, nodded and placed a hand on his son's shoulder  
"I, suppose…"  
Sasuke proceeded to jump up and down.  
"Oh! And I haven't even told you the best bit! He loves me back!"  
Mikoto joined her son's joyful prancing while Fugaku shook his head and sighed.  
"I'm too old for this…"

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Temari Sabaku walked down the hall of her semi – detached house in search of her younger brother Gaara. He had been acting strange all week, doing what he was told, tidying his room, _smiling_, it was scary! Not to mention the boy he kept bringing over, something was going on with he younger brother and she was going to find out!

She followed the sound of Slipknot and came face to face with a black door with scratchy white writing that read;  
`Gaara's room, enter without permission and I promise you they won't find your body, all complaints to be filed to someone who gives a shit…I am _NOT _someone who gives a shit…'  
Temari rolled her eyes.  
_I swear that boy takes emo to a whole new level…  
_she knocked gently on the door, blaring rock music or not Gaara would know she was there, he was like, psychic or something.  
The stoic boy answered the door, unblinking.  
"…Can I help you…?"  
"Yes, actually, you can! Gaara, who is that boy who you keep bringing round, hiding in your bedroom and sneaking out before we get a look at him?"  
"…My boyfriend…"  
Temari blinked at her brother.  
"What?"  
Gaara sighed at his sister.  
"Look, I understand you're a bit slow, so I'll make this easy for you, _me likey boy, me askey boy out_ (1) _me and boy do what the rabbits do, _capiche?"  
The blonde stood there speechless for a moment, and all too soon for Gaara the moment ended.  
"You're what! You've only been going to that school for a year! Going to an all boys school makes you gay!"  
"No Temari, my love of cock makes me gay"  
"I will get to the bottom of this Sabaku no Gaara just you wait and see!"  
She turned on her heel and stalked down the hallway.  
"...Are all women crazy or is it just me…?"

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Mikoto Uchiha was ecstatic for two reasons.  
One) her seemingly emotionless son had just declared he was in love and that the feeling was mutual. And  
two) the one who had captured his previously frozen heart was coming over for dinner, tonight!  
It was every mothers dream come true!  
she trotted over to the stairs, everything was ready except dinner, she wanted the boys to have some alone time before they all had to sit together.  
"Sasuke! What time will he be getting here again?!"  
"Four mum!"  
"And what time is it?!"  
"Three fifty mum!"  
"He'll be here soon!"  
Just then the doorbell rang, and Mikoto had kitten's on the floor, she skipped over, yes skipped, and opened the door, and there before her stood the cutest little blonde boy she had ever seen.  
And she read heat Magazine!  
The small blonde boy stood, shifting nervously, looking up to meet Mikoto's gaze.  
"Hello, I'm Naruto Uzumaki; it's nice to finally meet you…"  
"The pleasure's all mine! Come in, come in! I'll go fetch Sasuke!"  
Mikoto lead Naruto through to the hallway before disappearing behind a thick mahogany door, when she emerged again, Sasuke was following her.  
"Hi Sasu!"  
Sasuke smiled at his blonde fox.  
"Hello Naru…"  
Mikoto grinned.  
"Why don't you boys go and play upstairs while I get dinner started hm?"  
"Sure thing Mrs. Uchiha"  
Mikoto giggled.  
"Oh please dear, call me Mikoto!"  
"Ok!"  
"Come on then Naru"  
Sasuke took Naruto's hand, much to Mikoto delight, and headed up the stairs and into Sasuke's room.  
Once the door was closed, Naruto was slammed into it by Sasuke.  
"Sa-Sasuke…"  
"I love you Naruto…"  
"I, love you…Sasu-mph!"  
Sasuke pressed his lips to Naruto's, effectively cutting of whatever Naruto had been about to say. He moved away from his lips, making his way down his neck, licking and nipping at the sensitive skin there.  
"Ah..ha…sasu….ngh!"  
Sasuke smirked against Naruto's neck.  
"Hmm?"  
"Ti-tickles Sasuke!"  
"Mmm Hmm…"  
"Ahh!"  
Sasuke kissed a line of fire up to Naruto's ear, licking the lobe, and working his way back down again. Sasuke slipped his hands under Naruto's shirt, toying with his navel, then moving up to tweak his nipples (2) Naruto pushed his chest into Sasuke's, and whimpered.  
"Ha! Ahh!"  
Without warning the door flew open and the two boys went flying, through the room and onto the floor, ending with Naruto landing on top of Sasuke, with Sasuke's hands still up his shirt. Itachi stood in the doorway, smirking at the knowledge that he had just interrupted something. and his smirk grew when the severely blushing Naruto dismounted Sasuke, stood and began to sort out his clothes, Sasuke following and doing the same.  
"Dinners ready…"  
Sasuke grumbled something that sounded like 'revenge` before looking at his brother.  
"Ever heard of knocking?"  
Itachi just laughed.

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(1) More like he forced himself upon XD

(2) ahh! dirty word!

Okay! Next weekend we see what Temari finds out! And face the awkward dinner! Sorry I didn't write more, I feel ill :(  
Do the usual, read, review and criticize!  
Yours always  
CoCoBookmark


	10. This is what happens in public school

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Hello again! It's Saturday so you know what that means! UPDATE!!!!!!!!!

_**I would also like to inform you that I have a poll posted on my profile that I need you vote for !!**_

Thanks go to **MissPumpkinHead **- *pulls out shovel* I'm still gunna fight you for L! OH! You just told me you'd get me an L plushy! I can't fight you now…*puts away shovel* **Taddifer **- I do not force you to update! You lie! **sango92 **– thanks again! **KristinaCleaver18 **– New reviewer! AHH! **Hanakisa** – Thank you! **Sinfalcon** – 8D **Sabishii Tenshi** – Thankies! **Yurika-chan** – Thanking you kindly! **angel61991 **– XD **Pepito rulz **– Thanks! **Sasuke-chan69 **– Thank you! **Alternative Angel** – Thankies! **Tobi lover666 **– Tobi is a good boy! **LuvNaruto100 **– I love it to! **TheRedMoonlight** – Another new reviewer! Yay!

**DISCLAIMER: **I don't own Naruto, But I own a Naruto fan book! Does that count?

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? with the help of a smitten Uchiha, let's hope so.

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Chapter 10: This is what happens in public school…

Naruto sat in an embarrassed silence at the Uchiha dinner table, glancing at a glaring Sasuke, and then to a smirking Itachi, who winked at him. Naruto inwardly groaned._  
Itachi saw us! OH MY GOD ITACHI SAW US! Shoot me now! Somebody up there hates me!_  
Itachi coughed and looked over to Naruto  
"So Naruto, I heard you and Sasuke upstairs, you sounded…busy, what were you doing?"

Naruto blushed.

"Erm, well…ah…"

Mikoto, being a woman, saw Naruto's…eagerness… to flee the dinner table and therefore did what every mother does in these kind of situations, she fabricated a lie.

"Oh no!"

The three males at the table turned to face her.

"What is it mum?"

"Well Sasu, I forgot to buy a…cake! That's right a cake, and we're nearly finished with dinner! Would you mind taking Naruto and getting one from the shop for me?"  
Inner Naruto did a happy dance.

"Of course mum, come on Naru…"

Naruto jumped up and practically ran with Sasuke from the room.

Itachi glared at his mother.

"Take your time!"

She waited for the door to close.

"Shame on you Itachi!"

Itachi pouted at his mother.

"…Kill joy…"

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Temari Sabaku was on a mission, a mission she liked to call _operation sisterly protection_, and what Gaara liked to call _operation bitch can't mind her own damn business_. She skulked, yes _skulked _through the halls of Konoha boy's school, and as it was the weekend, she thought that no one would be there, and it would be the best place to investigate her brothers sudden (1) interest in the same sex. Being the resourceful person she was, she had borrowed (2) a copy of her brothers timetable and was currently making her way to biology room 34. She turned a corner and her goal came into sight.

_Bingo!_

However, she was not prepared for what she found.

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**WARNING SLIGHT LEMON, CHECK BEHIND YOUR SHOLDERS FOR YOUR PARENTS!!!!!!!**

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

A thin pale man with long black hair was naked and spread eagled on the desk while a white haired man thrust into his small body, his long penis (3) disappearing and reappearing from his hole at a rapid pace.

"Ahh, ngh! Jiraiya! Harder!"

"O-orochimaru! So tight!"

"What the hell are you doing?! This is a public school!"

The thrusting stopped and both the men turned stare at the blonde girl standing in the doorway. The pale man blushed.

"We, we can explain! You see the pervert and I were…"

"Save it for someone who cares! Dip me in chocolate and throw me to the lesbians! You _are _all gay in this school!"

Temari stormed out of the room in a huff;

The white haired man looked down at his companion.

"…Wanna go again?"

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**Okay! It's safe to read, but scroll down so you're parents don't see the word penis XD**

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

The Akatsuki were gathered in a small room at the bottom of the school, franticly discussing the disappearance of their three most treasured members. A blue skinned teen stood up to the podium with a pretty red headed boy next to him.

"Silence every one!"

A short haired blonde stood up.

"Why should we listen to you smurf boy?!"

The red head swiveled to face him.

"Hey don't call him a smurf!"

"Why not! He is one!"

"…Do smurf's have bondage obsessions and cat ear fetishes…?"

The blonde boy crossed his arms.

"…they do when the camera's not rolling!"

"I will not have you disgrace Kisame like that! That takes the cake the biscuit's and the coffee!"

The blonde blinked.

"…what?"

"I demand justice!"

"Silence!"

The room slowly fell silent and waited for the blue one, now known as Kisame, to speak.

"Look, Deidara, Tobi and Itachi have obviously been kidnapped by the blonde chibi's protectors!"

Murmurs of agreement spread throughout the room.

The red head looked at him.

"What should we do Kisame?"

"Well Sasori! That is simple! We rescue him!"

"But how?"

Kisame smiled.

"Simples! What we do is….."

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(1)Shows how much she knows XD

(2)Stolen

(3)ARGH!!! I hated writing this word DX

Sorry it's short! Really tired! Its 1:45 am here XD Remember to do the poll and review! Love CoCoBookmark

xXx


	11. Dirty words and Computer nerds

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Hey everybody! Chapter 11 here! Thanks go to **MissPumpkinHead** – Yay! You got my birthday right! No one _ever _gets my birthday right! **narutoisuke **– Thank you! **Seductive666Yaoi666Lover666** - that's a very long name you got there XD, thanks for reviewing 8D and **Ryomarox **– I know XD I do it as well :D

Remember to Review 83 coz you luff meh!

_**I would also like to inform you that I have a poll posted on my profile that I need you vote for !! yup! It's still open XD I will close it next weekend :)**_

**DISCLAIMER: **I don't own Naruto, But my mother owns me :D

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? with the help of a smitten Uchiha, let's hope so.

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Chapter 11: Dirty words and computer nerds.

Sasuke may not have been around many people in his life, he found people a waste of time and preferred to be alone, but he had enough experience to know when someone was panicking.  
And Naruto was panicking.  
"What are we gunna do!!! He saw us! He's gunna tell your mum! She'll think I'm a sexual deviant! And then, then she'll tell my Daddy and he'll have a 'my child is a sex addict' induced heart attack, and my Dad will probably go all emo on me because people recovering from heart attacks are delicate and the hospital won't let you have sex on their beds and then he'll start listening to Lionel Richie's 'Hello' and then once Daddy's out of hospital he'll lock me in a cupboard and never talk to me again!"  
Sasuke stared at his small blonde boyfriend.  
"… You lost me at sexual deviant…"  
"Sasuke!"  
"What?"  
"This is serious!"  
Sasuke sighed.  
"Don't be so paranoid Naru!, My Mum loves you and Kakashi will probably give me an award for making out with you, pervert that he is, and Iruka knows I love you, so what's the problem?"  
"Oh yea! You said you love me in front of daddy, but you didn't have your hands up my shirt when you said it! He won't be happy when he finds out we nearly…and you were touching…and it felt so…."  
Naruto blushed, changing the subject.  
"Do you remember the talk they gave you?"  
Sasuke paled.  
"…Yeah, I remember…"  
"Well that was the watered down version!"  
Sasuke's eyes widened fractionally.

"…You mean there's…More!? But they told me everything, condoms, lube, preparation, they had diagrams!"  
"…They have _two _ life size dummies and a periodic table of sexual positions…"  
"Oh My Gods!!!"  
"Yeah, they keep them in the loft…"  
Sasuke shivered.  
"…They must never know!"

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Kisame stared over the head of a boy with red hair and multiple piercings to look at the computer screen that resided there; mesmerized at the rate at which the boys hands were moving.  
"Whoa, you're a wiz at this, do you practice?"  
The boy tilted his head slightly to show he was listening.  
"Yes…on weekdays…"  
Kisame blinked.  
"So what do you do on the weekends?"  
The boy sighed.  
"I sit there and wait for my emails to come…"  
Kisame stared at him like he had grown a second head. The boy continued.  
"It's sad really…"  
Kisame nodded.  
"It is…"  
"They should take me away and lock me in a cell with padding and a glass wall where teachers can bring students to see me and say 'Look kids, this is what the internet will do to you…'"  
Kisame snickered.  
"Well that would be effective…is it done yet?"  
The boy gave a nod.  
"Almost.."  
Kisame grinned, showing his unnaturally sharp teeth.  
"Ok Akatsuki! The rescue mission is nearly ready! Is everyone prepared?"  
A boy with half his hair dyed green and the other half dyed black held a net launcher into the air.  
"Ready!"  
The blonde boy that had confronted Kisame earlier held multicolored lolly's in the air.  
"Ready!"  
Sasori waved a TachiDeiTobi Detector 3000 in the air.  
"Ready!"  
Kisame clapped happily.  
"Yes! Pein?! Is it done?"  
The red head with the piercings nodded.  
"Indeed.."  
Kisame drummed the tips of his fingers together.  
"Excellent…"(1)

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Iruka stood in the kitchen next to his husband, washing dishes while Kakashi dried them.  
"And then two little blonde boys from 11E did a report on hetrozy…"  
Kakashi covered his ears.  
"Don't say that!"  
Iruka blinked.  
"Say what?"  
"That word! It's dirty!"  
"What hetro?"  
"ARGH!"  
Iruka rolled his eyes.  
"Oh grow up!"  
Kakashi turned to face his lover.  
"Me? Grow up?! I'm the mature one!"  
Iruka's face was blank.  
"…Hetro…."  
Kakashi stuck his fingers in his ears.  
"Ahh!"  
He dropped the sponge he had been using to wash his dishes to point at his partner.  
"Says the mature one!"  
Kakashi threw his dish cloth at Iruka.  
"shut up and kiss me"  
Iruka smiled at him.  
"that's the most sensible thing you've said all day"  
"really? I thought the thing about the chocolate squirrels was very sensible…"  
Iruka sweat dropped.  
"Kashi, this is romantic don't make me hit you…"  
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(1)I stole that from the Simpsons XD  
Okay chapter 11! Remember to vote and to review  
Love CoCoBookmark


	12. The plan

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WARNINING IF YOU SEE THE WORD POOP DO NOT PANIC, IT'S JUST MY UNCLE ALBERT ATTACKING MY LAPTOP, HE THINKS IT'S FUNNY TO DISTURB MY YAOI INDUCED MEDATIVE STATE BY RUNNING HIS HANDS ALL OVER MY KEYBOARD….STRANGE MAN….Anyway…

Hello all! Chapter, what is it? 12? Wow :D and it could have never happened without you guys! The result of the poll came out that it's too soon for a lemon, so no lemon for now, but if you feel you want one just tell me :) Thanks go to **justgottahavesomeraman **– I know! Raman is so nice! I had Vegetarian Raman and it was orgasmic! Thanks for reading! **nenab23 **– Thanks! **Hanakisa **– Thanks for reading! I remember your name XD **KillerLiger3000 **– You're new right? Thanks for reading my story! I hope you enjoy it XD **Uchiha Ichigo123 **– lol, Uchiha strawberry :3 **sango92 **– Thanks again! **Sinfalcon **– whoop! How long till the Naru-dress-pic is done! I really want to see it! **Alternative Angel **- Thanks for reviewing XD **Pepito rulz **–Thankies! **oOoOYukiOoOo **– Thanks for reviewing most of the chapters XD **MissPumpkinHead **– Hey pumpkin! :3 Thanks for everything! **karl301 **– lol, I love the name Karl XD **Uchiha-Tora-Shi **– Thank you!

Uncle Albert: "She won't let me type Poop!!"

Me: ""

**DISCLAIMER: **I don't own Naruto, but I am fighting Pumpkin for L! an when I win, I will own him and his sexy ass body!

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? With the help of a smitten Uchiha, let's hope so.

L WILL BE MINE! ON WITH THE FIC!

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Chapter 12: the plan

Itachi sat with Deidara and Tobi on his double bed, whispering as to not wake the two sleeping boys next door. Once they had returned from there cake buying, Sasuke had convinced (1) Naruto to sleepover, and they were currently snuggled up under the covers Itachi sat in Black Pj's with red sheep, while Deidara had black with red piglets and Tobi had a black and orange night dress on with shorts underneath.  
"D'ara?, Tobi?"  
Deidara tilted his head to face Itachi, and Tobi looked at him from the end of the bed.  
"Un?"  
"Do you get the feeling were forgetting something? At school I mean?"  
Deidara looked thoughtful, and Tobi looked sleepy.  
"Nu uh 'I'tchi…nufin….to r'memba…."  
"No un…why?"  
Itachi smiled, leaning in to kiss Deidara on the lips.  
"No reason…Lets go to sleep…Tobi looks about ready to drop dead…"  
Deidara slid under the covers with Itachi, and hummed in content, while Tobi crawled up and flopped beside Deidara.  
"Yeah, I'm sure whatever it is can wait till morning un…"  
Tobi nodded into the pillow.  
"Uh huh…morning…."  
Itachi nodded sleepily.  
"Yeah…G'night D'ara…night Tobi…"  
Deidara rolled to lye his head on Itachi's chest.  
"Hmm, G'night 'Tachi…night Tobi"  
When Tobi snored in response, mumbling something that sounded like 'Fabulous!' the couple laughed and drifted off to sleep in each other's arms.

The next morning Naruto and Sasuke trudged down the stairs to meet Deidara, Itachi and Tobi in the Kitchen making breakfast. Naruto stumbled into a chair at the table and looked at the egg on toast that had been placed in front of him. Sasuke slid in next to him and began to eat his own breakfast. Itachi was the first to break the strange sleep induced silence.  
"So baby brother, did you and Naru-Chibi have…_fun…_last night?"  
Sasuke glared at his brother.  
"Did you?"  
Itachi blinked.  
"With Naruto? Certainly not! Deidara would castrate me and then the police would get involved an…"  
"It's a tad late to be worrying about the police don't you think? You already kidnapped him, held him hostage, forcibly removed his clothes and died his underwear pink, all in the same day! He should have you done for assault!"  
Deidara scoffed at him.  
"Please, when your this fabulous your beyond the law"  
Tobi nodded.  
"Yup yup, Tobi fabulize's everyone's hair so we don't go to prison! Tobi can't go to prison! Tobi is a good boy! Do you know what they do to good boys in prison!?"  
Sasuke rolled his eyes at the three supposedly _mature _older teens.  
"Whatever, come on, were gunna be late for school…"  
He looked over at his boyfriend.  
Naruto looked around the room at the total lack of nightclothes on everyone but himself and Sasuke.  
"I should probably get dressed then?"  
The four taller males nodded.  
"…Right….be back soon!"  
Naruto left the kitchen and headed to Sasuke's room, the other boys laughter following him up the stairs the whole way.

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Kisame paced around in the small storage room the Akatsuki called 'base', waiting, and plotting the most appropriate moment to strike.  
"We can't get to him in lessons, after school?"  
The red head with the piercings shook his head in the negative.  
"No, too many witnesses…."  
Kisame nodded.  
"Before school?"  
The boy with the black and green hair groaned in disapproval.  
"Too early!"  
Kisame rolled his eyes, then his face lit up as an idea hit him.  
"Lunch?"  
The remaining members looked at each other then nodded. Silently agreeing with their blue tinted comrade, who grinned like a great white.  
"Lunch it is then…we'll be waiting for you Naruto…"

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( 1 ) forced…

I'm so sorry! My mum is kicking me off the laptop like right this second! I'm so sorry! I will update again tomorrow! AHH! I want to scream! MUST POST NOW!!!


	13. The plan in motion

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I would like to apologize for the abrupt end to chapter 12 yesterday!!!! I had more planned out but was forced to go to bed early so I could make my mum breakfast in bed in the morning! I was not impressed!

Anyway! On to chapter 13!! Thanks go to! **MissPumpkinHead **– Put them down you Uncle Albert, L stealing fiend!!!!! **KillerLiger3000 **– *Hides file filled with pictures of KillerLiger3000*…yeah…the penny told me…sure….lets go with that! **Zenerific1 **- Your knew, Hazzah! I love knew reviewers!!! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy! **Hanakisa** - one update coming your way!!! Thanks! **Alternative Angel **– Well crazy Sasuke is the best Sasuke! **Alittlenii-chan **– another new reviewer! Wow! It's like Christmas but without the cold!!! **Pepito rulz **– Thanks for reading!

**DISCLAIMER: **I don't own Naruto, but I do own a chainsaw (Looks at Pumpkin) your going down….

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? With the help of a smitten Uchiha, let's hope so.

*PICKS UP CHAINSAW AND HEADS AFTER MISSPUMPKINHEAD* "GET BACK HERE! HIS ASS IS MINE I TELLS YA!!! MINE!!! AHHHH!! ON WITH THE FIC!"

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….PREVIOUSLY ON WELCOME TO KONOHA BOYS SCHOOL…..

_Kisame paced around in the small storage room the Akatsuki called 'base', waiting, and plotting the most appropriate moment to strike.  
"We can't get to him in lessons, after school?"  
The red head with the piercings shook his head in the negative.  
"No, too many witnesses…."  
Kisame nodded.  
"Before school?"  
The boy with the black and green hair groaned in disapproval.  
"Too early!"  
Kisame rolled his eyes, then his face lit up as an idea hit him.  
"Lunch?"  
The remaining members looked at each other then nodded. Silently agreeing with their blue tinted comrade, who grinned like a great white.  
"Lunch it is then…we'll be waiting for you Naruto…"_

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Chapter 13: The plan in motion...

Naruto lifted his head of the desk and looked at the clock of doom, following the hands of the clock with his azure eyes.

_Tick…tock…tick…tock…tick…tick…Wait? Tick tick? Damn cheating clock went backwards!!  
_Naruto let his head fall back onto his desk with an audible thump.  
"Ouch…"  
Sasuke looked at his little blonde fox.  
"What is it Naru?"  
Naruto looked up at Sasuke with watering eyes.  
"Time is going backwards and the clock is laughing at me!"  
Sasuke sighed.  
"Well we have five minutes till the end of lessons, and then we have lunch, that's not too long? Right"  
Naruto snorted.  
"Pfft, tell _that _to the evil clock mastermind over there!"  
Sasuke blinked.  
"You know I worry about you sometimes…"

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Somewhere, in the underworld of the school ( 1 ) the remaining members of the Akatsuki were putting their plans into action.  
"Sasori, what does the TachiDeiTobi Detector say?"  
Sasori studied the bleeping machine.  
"There in their assigned lessons…"  
Kisame looked thoughtful for a moment.  
"Hmm, if there in school why haven't they reported back to us, do you think?"  
"What if they were brain washed?!"  
Kisame gasped.  
"Of course, that's it!"  
"We must save them!"  
Kisame nodded, and turned to the other blonde of the group.  
"Hidan, do you have the bait?"  
The blonde called Hidan took out the lollies and shoved them in kisame's face.  
"Yeah I got your bait, don't fucking see why I have to do it though…."  
Kisame grinned.  
"Because, you're blonde, he's blonde, there's an unspoken bond of blondeness!"  
Hidan sweat dropped while Kisame looked over to Pein.  
"And you have the voice changing software right?"  
The red head nodded.  
"Uh huh, the blonde will think it's his precious Uchiha talking, he won't suspect a thing…"  
Kisame grinned for the second time that day.  
"Perfect…"  
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The bell sounded for lunch and Naruto leaped from his seat.  
"Finally! Come on Sasuke!"  
Sasuke chuckled at his lover and walked with him out of the classroom.  
"Okay okay! But I need the toilet first so wait here, I'll be right back, don't move!"  
Naruto giggled.  
"Cubs honor!"  
Sasuke smirked.  
"Were you even in the Cubs?"  
Naruto shook his head.  
"Nope!"  
"Hmm, well be safe okay? There are fan boys on the loose, if they didn't have single cubicle toilets I would take you with me, stupid inconvenient lavatories…"  
"Sasuke! Go before you pee yourself!"  
"Ha! I'm an Uchiha, we don't _pee _ourselves!"  
"Please, not even you are above nature Sasu! Now go, I'll be fine!"  
Reluctantly Sasuke turned and headed into the toilet opposite the classroom. Naruto watched his raven haired lover leave before turning to the notes board by the door of the classroom he had just left.  
Naruto was just looking at a poster for a fox appreciation club when he was pulled rather sharply from his left.  
"Hey what the hell?"  
Naruto assessed the boy who had pulled him. He had blond hair and looked well build, Naruto shrank back a bit. The strange blonde smiled at him, well he tried to, but it looked more like a grimace.  
"Did you hear! There giving out free lolly pops! See!"  
To emphasize his point he held up three multi coloured lollies and waved them in Naruto's face. Which lit up at the sight of them.  
"Really! Where?"  
"Just round the corner! Hurry there gunna run out!"  
Naruto looked heartbroken.  
"I can't I'm waiting for my boyfriend"  
The other blonde looked thoughtful.  
"Why don't you get one _for _your boyfriend?"  
"Oh he said he doesn't like sweet things, except me!"  
The other boy looked panicked before he seemed to settle himself.  
"I'm pretty sure they had green tea flavor, that's not sweet…"  
Naruto looked ecstatic.  
"Really! Sasuke loves green tea!"  
The other blonde nodded.  
"Yeah, but you have to go now before they run out!"  
"Well, I'm sure Sasuke won't mind if I get him one too! Thanks"  
Naruto took of round the corner skipping happily; he never saw the evil glint in the other blonde boy's eyes.

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Itachi sat, thoughtful, at his lunch table. Tobi and Deidara looked at him.  
"'Tachi? What wrong un?"  
"Yeah, what's the matter?"  
Itachi sighed, poking his pasta.  
"Nothing, I just can't shake the feeling we're forgetting something…"  
"Hmm, give it time, It'll pass un…"  
Tobi nodded in agreement.  
"Uh huh, maybe it was some homework that you forgot to do, Oh! What about the assignment on colour meanings? I Chose red and black? What about you guys?"  
Itachi Opened his mouth to reply, but froze half way.  
"Deidara…Tobi…I know what we forgot…"  
"What un…?"  
"…Akatsuki!"  
Deidara and Tobi looked horror stricken.  
"How could we forget un?!"  
"Oh no!"  
"I don't know! By the Gods! Their gunna go mental!"  
Deidara gasped.  
"Naruto! No! un!"  
Itachi grabbed his bag and started to run for the door, Deidara and Tobi close behind.

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Naruto looked at the door with the sign that read free lolly pops here, he went to push the door when a familiar voice sounded behind him.  
"Na-ru-tooo…."  
Naruto spun around, only to be met with a slightly ajar door.  
"Sasuke? That you?"  
"Yes, naruto…..come here, I have a surprise for you…"  
Naruto headed towards the empty classroom, talking to Sasuke the whole way.  
"Is it a lolly pop, cause if it is you stole my….Sasuke? Where are you?"  
Naruto looked around the empty classroom, confusion written all over his face.  
"Sas – mph!!! amp! Wetf mfe woo! Sassuukf!"  
Naruto struggled against the hand closed over his mouth. And a voice that was not Sasuke's filtered into his ears.  
"Sasuke's not here Naruto, now, you coming with me to tell me what you did with Deidara Itachi and Tobi!"

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Sasuke exited the toilet, and started to look for his blonde, only to find someone else's. The new blonde looked at him. Smirking.  
"You want your blonde?"  
Sasuke growled.  
"What did you do with him?!"  
"We have him, and we won't return him till we get back our leader and the others!"  
"What are you talking about!?"  
"Don't play dumb with me kid, we know you have them, it's a fair trade, you want him back, go to the storage room where we hold our meeting's in…we'll be waiting…"  
Sasuke looked about ready to explode, he pointed an accusing finger at the boy.  
"Damn you nail polish wearing lady boys! Where the heck are the police?"  
"Please the only anime where police are affective is Death note!"  
"Your gunna be so sorry!"  
But before the boy could reply, Sasuke was already half way down the hall.  
And he swore he could hear the other laughing behind him…

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( 1 ) Don't ask me why a school has an underworld…It's probably where they store all the dead bodies…

Muhahahah! Does that count as a cliffy? By the Gods I hope so!!!  
Anyway! The usual, read, review, update…no wait, that's me, read and review!  
Love CoCoBookmark :3


	14. The plan, It PHFAILS!

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Hey everyone! I would like to warn you that this chapter may be short because I was at my sister's house babysitting a screaming baby and it took me AGES to get connected to the internet! Damn network keys needing to be in capitals! No one told me! I was out for most of the day, so I couldn't work on it DX And so I ended up on a sofa in Erith typing yaoi for all my loving fans, watching the Justin lee Collins Show XD then I left my charger at My sister's house and didn't get it back till a couple of days ago, and because of the ban I couldn't write any yet, but I'm tempting fate by writing it now. Anyway, thanks go to! **MissPumpkinHead **– Best reviewer ever! **Skittles26 **– thank you!!! READ HER STORY!!!! DO IT NOW!!! **Narutoisuke** –Thankies! **Seductive666Yaoi666Lover666 **– I'm actually in love with your name…I may have to marry it 8D, along with Miss Pumpkin Head XD **hanakisa **– thanks again! **Elany **– you're new! Whoop! **NinjaxGirlX1989 **– you're new as well!!!! **Narugaaralover** – are you new as well???? Wow! **sasunaru8080 **– another new one!!! **Uchiha-Tora-Shi **– thank you! **xXxEmoLurvexXx **– thanks! **Lilia0 -** I think I may give up on the thank you's and just do smiley faces! **Zenerific1**- 8D **Alternative Angel** – 83 **Sinfalcon** – 8P swowling Gemma – XD **KoreyuMaaka** – XP **Zutaragirl22** - :D **Vampirebloodgirl** – 8) **The Taddy Police** - I'll have you know that without me there none of those funny things would have happened!!!! **Misuki Anime Miko **– Thanks!!! **jazzylin-sama **– thanks for the alert! **FireFoxTail **– thanks!!!

**DISCLAIMER: **I don't own Naruto, Just my dirty smutty mind XD

**SUMMERY: **Naruto and his two fathers Kakashi and Iruka just moved to Konoha, In between crazy nail polish wearing occults , perverted teachers and making new, albeit strange, friends can he pass his GCSE's? With the help of a smitten Uchiha, let's hope so.

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_P_reviously _on Buffy the vampire slayer….._

_Naruto struggled against the hand closed over his mouth. And a voice that was not Sasuke's filtered into his ears.  
"Sasuke's not here Naruto, now, you coming with me to tell me what you did with Deidara Itachi and Tobi!……".  
"You want your blonde?"  
Sasuke growled.  
"What did you do with him?!"  
"We have him, and we won't return him till we get back our leader and the others!_

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Chapter 14: The plan, It PHFAILS!

Naruto sat, against his will, in the storage room beneath the school. A red head with piercings all over his face stepped towards the blonde.  
"Tell us where they are!!"  
Naruto glared at him.  
"There having lunch!"  
The red head looked skeptical.  
"Why are they having lunch?"  
"Because it's lunch!"  
"…I don't believe you!"  
"Oh for the love of…!"  
"Silence!"  
A blue teen that Naruto had never seen before stepped out of the shadows and entered the light given out by the tiny light bulb suspended above him.  
"Look, cut the crap kid, we just want to know where they are…"  
Naruto groaned.  
"I told you! If there not in the canteen then I don't know!"  
The blue boy snorted.  
"Lies!"  
"Why don't you just ask D'ara 'Tachi and Tobi why there not talking to you?"  
"Don't talk like there your friends!"  
Naruto gritted his teeth.  
"They _are _my friends!"  
"Stop lying!"  
"I'm not!"  
"Then why aren't they here?"  
"There probably avoiding you! You great blue loon!"  
"Hn…"  
Naruto looked at the boy in front of him.  
_These guys are crazy! Sasuke…where are you?!_

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_Damn damn damn damn DAMN!!!_  
Sasuke ran past classroom after classroom looking for the stairs that lead to the basement, he had heard his brother talking about it on the phone once, so he knew roughly where he was headed. He was just rounding a corner when he bumped into his older brother, Deidara and Tobi. Itachi breathlessly addressed his brother.  
"Sasuke!"  
And that was all it took for Sasuke to break down. He flung himself forwards, grabbing the fabric of his brothers shirt, angry tears threatening to fall from his eyes.  
"Tachi they took him! They took him and I can't find him! Tachi make them give him back! Tachi!"  
Itachi rubbed small circles on his little brothers back.  
"Shh, Sasuke, it's okay, we know where they are Shh…"  
Deidara stepped around itachi, detaching Sasuke and pulling him into a rib crushing hug.  
"Yes Sasuke un! We'll get him back un!"  
Tobi looked at Deidara, then to itachi and stamped his foot in a huff.  
"This is _so _the opposite of fabulous!"

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"Tell me!!!"  
"I don't know!"  
"Look here you little blonde midget!"  
"Look here you sharp toothed fruitcake!"  
"How dare you?"  
"Like this! YOU'RE A FRUITCAKE!"  
Pein stepped forwards, trying to calm down his blue tinted comrade before he hurt the suspect.  
"Kisame, maybe he's telling the truth"  
"No! he's a…"  
Without warning the door to the storage room was thrown open by a very pissed looking Sasuke, Itachi Tobi and Deidara in hot pursuit. Mostly to make sure Sasuke didn't kill them all. For a moment, the room was silent, then all hell broke loose. Sasuke went for Kisame, only to be held back by his brother.  
"Get your stinking hands of my property shark boy!"  
Kisame looked taken aback.  
"Tobi? Itachi? Deidara?"  
Itachi released his brother, striding over to where Pein was.  
"Untie my brother in law this instant!"  
Deidara turned to glare at Hidan, who was hiding behind a box.  
"Yeah un! What the hell did you think you were doing un?!"  
Sasuke, being freed of the bonds of his brothers arms, ran to Naruto's side, working on the knots that held him in place.  
"Sasuke!"  
"Naru! I'm so happy your okay, I'm so sorry, next time you come with me! Single cubicle or not!"  
Naruto laughed at him. The kind of laugh only someone scared out of there mind who finally felt safe could manage to produce.  
"Okay"  
Tobi, who had been watching from afar the whole time, strode over to the far corner of the room where a wooden podium stood. He climbed the small steps till he reached the microphone, and proceeded to tap it.  
"Excuse me? Would someone like to explain to me what's going on? Kisame?"  
"I'm so sorry master! We thought they had brainwashed you!"  
Naruto and Sasuke shared a look, before Sasuke turned to face his brother.  
"Master?"  
Itachi appeared pleased at the question and showed the two bewildered boys his best smile.  
"Why yes, Tobi's our leader, didn't you know?"  
While Sasuke and Naruto picked their jaws up from off the floor, Tobi continued.  
"And you didn't think to ask us? Even though you have the TachiDeiTobi detector with you?"  
Kisame stared at the ground ashamed.  
"N-no great leader we did not…"  
"Well then, as punishment, all your hair dye will be confiscated and set alight in a sacrificial burning…"

Brief horror flashed across kisame's face.  
"What? What sacrificial burning?"  
Tobi smiled.  
"The one I just made up"  
He looked over to Naruto.  
"Are you okay Naru-Chibi? I'm so sorry about Kisame, he's not a good boy like me"  
"I'm good thanks Tobi"  
"Very well, 'Tachi, D'ara, fetch the lighters and nail polish remover! Its punishment time!"  
Kisame fell to the floor, twitching and mumbling something about natural gingers. Itachi grinned.  
"Hey Tobi, I think you killed him…"  
Tobi shrugged.  
"Tobi didn't kill him, Tobi is a good boy!"  
"If you say so….Hey Tobi?"  
"Yes? 'Tachi?"  
"Where the heck are we gunna start a fire in the middle of the school without being caught by someone?"  
Tobi looked thoughtful.  
"..Hmmm, we'll have to go to a part of the school where no one goes, where teachers and students alike fear to tread!"  
Deidara did a little jump and pointed to the door.  
"TO THE MATHS BLOCK UN!"

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Thank you so much if you're still reading this! It's 1:59am here and I'm so tiered! Sorry I couldn't update last week, I was so busy! Love you all REVIEW!

CoCoBookmark xxx


	15. Authors note

Okay, first of all I would like to apologize for being a complete twat and not updating for what must have been over 2 years now (if anyone would like to scald me with the exact length of time I was away feel free, I really do deserve it) and I'm so very sorry, alot happened in the time I was gone, I finished my GCSE's got accepted into a sixthform, completed 4 A levels, and then Moved to Bournemouth to attend University! (tah dah) Im 19 now and had almost forgotten that I once started writing a silly little ficlet when I was 15 because I loved writing and wanted a crack at it, and it took a misc subscriber to spur me back into action. I realised that people actually liked this story, even though its not the best, and its badly written and the layout is whack. I realised I O U. So, although updates will be few and far between (assignments and shit), there _will _be updates. And I want to thank every single one of you for reading my crappy little outlook on love. I hope you forgive me. But this note is a promise for anyone who really likes this story, I am back and have a chapter almost finished. I love you all and thank you 3


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